We interrupt our regularly scheduled post about our vacation week for a hurricane related one.
Hurricane Irene barreled her way up the East Coast this weekend, and right into our home. I knew something was brewing Saturday morning, as we were packing up from our vacation, cut short by one day. Howie was relentless in his request for hugs. Every three minutes he was crawling all over me. And when he wasn’t asking for a hug, he was smashing himself into something. Or someone.
By this morning, I had my own hurricane. Spinning, whirling, crashing. A wild path of destruction.
He’s my walking barometer. I’ve learned now that when he’s completely dysregulated, a storm is brewing. Inside and out.
When he’s like this, I just don’t know what to do. I know the stimming and the behavior is hurricane related. But how much do I try to redirect it when it’s caused by the force of nature? My inclination was to let it go, but it was making his brothers crazy.
My youngest imitates the nonsense language and out of control behaviors. My oldest is tormented by them.
There are times when I wish it was just me and Howie. I could just let him be. Like a hurricane that veers off to sea, there would be no one to destroy in his path. He could spin and run and scream bathroom words and yell out phrases that sound like he’s swearing. And no innocent bystanders would be caught in his path, begging for him to stop.
But we don’t live like that. The five of us had to be in the house together and ride out the storm.
It was a very long day.
Around 4pm, the skies suddenly cleared and the wind stopped blowing. Outside the hurricane had passed.
Inside, we had a lot of cleaning up to do. The bumping and the crashing and the yelling had not stopped.
I grabbed Howie’s hand and told everyone I was taking him for a walk. Still in our pajamas, we headed out to survey the damage. A quick trip up and down the block showed that we were the only place in town that still had power. A few puddle splashes later, we were back in our yard.
And I let my hurricane go.
He broke tree branches. He dove into puddles. He did laps around the trees in our yard. He ran back and forth and back and forth and back and forth.
Forty-five minutes later, he was done. Downgraded to a minor tropical depression, we headed inside for dinner.
And all was calm again.
I don’t know how to give him the space he needs to make himself feel better. All I know is that somehow I have to get him to let it out of his system before we all get dragged into it.
Hopefully it’s a long long time before we have to figure it out again
Goodnight, Irene.
“You are like a hurricane
There’s calm in your eye.
And I’m gettin’ blown away
To somewhere safer
where the feeling stays.
I want to love you but
I’m getting blown away.“ – Like A Hurricane by Neil Young
Try Defying Gravity 
August 28, 2011 at 10:52 pm
It never ceases to amaze me how much weather changes affect Eli’s whole person. Glad you all survived these hurricanes.
August 28, 2011 at 11:21 pm
I totally “GET” you!!! I was just telling my husband that Irene had NOTHING on Lucas this weekend, and Irene was pretty darn rough!!
I find that Lucas is a completely unbound little man when the moon changes and this weekend was the start of a new moon. He also just seems to be so uncomfortable in his own skin when the barometric pressure drops, so coupled with being cooped up in the house, and hearing sirens and everything else all night long, it was pandemonium to say the least!
We were able to get him to calm down a bit today but your right it was like going through two hurricanes this weekend not just one!!
Debbie Kinkade
Lucas’s Journey w/SPD
http://lucasjourneyspd.blogspot.com
http://www.facebook.com/lucasjourneyspd
August 28, 2011 at 11:46 pm
Oh yeah….my son is a human barometer too….even on a regular windy day he is out of control so I can’t imagine what a hurricane would do to him.
Oh and you nailed it when you said: “There are times when I wish it was just me and Howie. I could just let him be. ”
I have often thought the exact same thing. I have imagined how much easier it would be for both of us if he was an only child.
Hugs (( ))
August 29, 2011 at 12:06 am
It always amazes me how our kids absorb what is going on around them, and reflect it back out to the world. Sometimes it is our emotions that get mirrored, sometimes it is the chaos of the outside world. I feel for you.
When we were snowed in for 5 days during the Snowpocalypse, it was just the same on Pudding. I asked my parents to buy an indoor swing, because I could never face how dysregulated she became with no way of making it better. I’m glad your hurricane is downgraded. Hopefully calm weather ahead for you now.
August 29, 2011 at 4:56 am
There is no hurricane or storm whose fury can match the strength of a mother’s love.
Your boys are blessed beyond measure to have you.
Beautiful post.
xo
August 29, 2011 at 9:50 am
you. are. amazing!!! even though you may feel like you don’t know what to do… you really did yesterday – and the right moment appeared for you to take Howie by the hand and do it! he and your family are blessed to have your strength and guidance.
we had three indoor-hurricanes here, too… happy to have sunny days now 🙂
August 29, 2011 at 11:47 am
Spectrummy Mummy hit the nail on the head saying that they absorb everything around them and “Sometimes it is our emotions that get mirrored, sometimes it is the chaos of the outside world”.
Oh, I feel for all of you for having to have gone through yesterday. It is so hard to figure out what to do to help, but you did exactly the right thing – you did know how to give him the space he needed, and he knew exactly what to do with that space to help himself. Howie is lucky he has a mom who gets him so well. hugs.
August 29, 2011 at 8:15 pm
Wow! We have been there too. It is such a helpless feeling. You are one great mama! I am amazed and so proud of how you helped Howie and your entire family! I hope that now there has been a continued calm after the storm.
August 31, 2011 at 3:16 pm
I am so happy that you guys made it through that. Could Howie be any damn cuter in his pajamas?!?! I think not =)
October 26, 2012 at 2:19 pm
[…] when the pressure drops. I know it sounds weird, but we’ve seen it several times, including the last hurricane and that summer when the tornadoes rolled through western MA. It’s usually about 24-48 […]