Dear Coach-
I never thought I would see this day.
You see, up until now, we’ve stayed away from team sports. I could never see how it could work out. My son is hyper-competitive about EVERYTHING. We read a book about Hot Wheels cars, he looks to the end to see which car wins the race and declares “I’m that car.” We don’t play board games because they never end well. The whole win/lose concept is a tough one for him.
So a team sport? Yikes.
But this year many of his peers were starting to join Little League and I didn’t want him to feel left out. His older brother plays baseball and has since he was five. We’ve spent the past 4 springs and summers at the ball field.
So I asked him “Howie, do you want to play T-Ball this year?”
“Nope.” came the response. “I want to play soccer.”
Now I’m going to let you in on a secret, Coach. I know nothing about soccer. Nothing. Well, I know that in third grade I played soccer for three weeks and quit because it was too much running. I played softball. Less running. My brother and sister played baseball. So naturally, I wanted Howie to play baseball too. But nope, he picks soccer. Of all the sports, I know the least about the rules of soccer. It used to be hockey, but my friend Stimey has taught me a lot.
So…when he said “soccer”, I almost said no. Almost.
“Really? Soccer? Are you sure?”
“Yes. Soccer.”
I started to investigate. I knew we couldn’t play spring soccer in our town league. The kids there had been playing for years already, even at age six. The competition level would be too much.
I had some friends who had played on your TOPSoccer league last year and enjoyed it. And that’s where we landed.
I’m going to let you in on another secret, Coach. Initially, the thought of signing him up for a special needs soccer program was hard. Clicking that link off the main soccer page wasn’t easy. But…acceptance starts at home. I know what my son can and cannot do. Any other league but yours would be setting him up for failure.
And I would be failing him more if I didn’t do it at all.
I told him I had signed him up to play. This was about a month ago.
He has asked me EVERY SINGLE DAY when soccer was going to start.
Can I tell you again, Coach, I never thought we’d make it here?
From the moment he stepped on that field, he was home.
You welcomed him in, paired him with a helper, and off he went. Surrounded by friends – new and old.
He ran up and down that field. He clapped for his “team” and he smiled every minute.
He scored two goals. You made sure of that. You gave him high fives and cheered him on.
You want to talk inclusion? For the first time, my kid was a part of something.
Next week may be different. I don’t know.
But you know what? I can’t wait to find out.
Is it Sunday again yet?
See you on the soccer field.
Sincerely,
Alysia (Howie’s mom)
“Take me out to the ball game
Take me out to the crowd.
Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack
I don’t care if I ever get back…” – Take Me Out To The Ball Game
April 15, 2012 at 11:36 pm
LOVE that coach!
wonderful story….woohoooo!
April 16, 2012 at 8:42 am
I love the coach too 🙂
April 15, 2012 at 11:36 pm
This is fantastic! It brings tears to my eyes. I love this coach and wish every team in the world had someone so great! I am so happy that Howie is enjoying soccer and fitting in and everything. Thanks for making my night!
April 15, 2012 at 11:50 pm
The things we do for our kids. Even loving soccer. 🙂 Seriously though, I couldn’t be happier. That picture of you holding him? Love, love, love.
April 16, 2012 at 8:43 am
I know. Even soccer. Who would have thought? 🙂
April 16, 2012 at 12:04 am
Love this! I just blogged an hour or so about our experience with the local TOPsoccer program. My J tried the general league years ago and it was a disaster. Yesterday he started the TOPsoccer program and I cried on the sidelines as I watched him thrive. So happy it was a great experience for Howie and I hope it continues the whole season!
April 16, 2012 at 8:43 am
Heading to read right now…
April 16, 2012 at 12:16 am
Love this! I’m so glad you guys had a great day!
April 16, 2012 at 12:21 am
How wonderful! And today Jake played ihs first game of challenger division Baseball! I didn’t think we’d ever get the glove on his hand (he kept trying to stuff all his fingers into one finger’s space) but he did it – and hit the ball, to boot. They made sure all the kids got on base & it was lovely. Having your SN kid being a part of something like a “regular” sporty boy is awesome, isn’t it?
April 16, 2012 at 8:44 am
Totally awesome 🙂 yay Jake!
April 16, 2012 at 12:28 am
I am absolutely bawling like a lunatic after reading this post. I’ve always wanted my son to be involved in SOME kind of group or club, even if it wasn’t sports, but it has never been a possibility in our area. I can’t imagine how wonderful it must have been to watch him have so much fun and score those goals. My kiddo is 13 now and it’s unlikely that he’ll become involved in something in high school (especially since his early experiences have soured him on anything social), but I’d like to believe it’s possible. Thank you so much for sharing.
April 16, 2012 at 8:45 am
Never say never. He’ll find something. You never know 🙂 I believe.
April 16, 2012 at 7:38 am
I love everything about this. It is a whole different thing, isn’t it—team sports for these kinds of kids? There is nothing better in the world. We’ve had good weeks and bad weeks and we always go back because even on bad weeks, everyone gets it. I am so happy for you and your guy! That last photo? So deeply good.
April 16, 2012 at 8:46 am
I never would have done this if I hadn’t seen your Jack play. The love is everywhere. Thank you for the gift you gave us.
April 16, 2012 at 8:36 am
I just love reading about all of our kids and how they find their way on the special teams. I was hesitant to pull the trigger on our own SN Soccer team…but this post convinces me that I shoul definitely pursue it for fall….wow. The last picture says soooo much.
April 16, 2012 at 8:47 am
Do it. Or ask around first. I checked with friends who had done challenger baseball and this soccer and they said soccer was the best choice here. Then do it. 🙂
April 16, 2012 at 8:44 am
Where did you ever find this Coach-Angel? This is just so perfect. What a smile on both of your faces!!
April 16, 2012 at 8:48 am
My smart and awesome friends did this last year and said it was great. They were right.
April 16, 2012 at 10:42 am
that is so awesome!
April 16, 2012 at 11:21 am
Thank you.
April 16, 2012 at 11:40 am
I LOVE it!!!!!!! So nice for our boys to be included in sports *Ü*
April 16, 2012 at 11:50 am
This is one of those posts that you wish you could “like” more than once.
April 16, 2012 at 12:13 pm
My son plays on a TOP Soccer league in Nebraska. He.Loves.It. I take pictures and video of him playing. Even when he’s mad because he may miss some laps of a NASCAR Race, he still gets into playing with and seeing his teammates and coaches.
He plays with an older group that has a few of the Special Olympics Soccer Nebraska team members on it.
I’m glad you found a TOP Soccer program. IMO, it’s one of the best things AYSO has done for youth soccer.
April 16, 2012 at 12:17 pm
Crying big, fat, HAPPY tears of joy for you and Howie. I don’t think I need to elaborate for you to know how very, very much I love this.
April 16, 2012 at 6:27 pm
These is the reason I LOVE to coach!!! Great story, keep us updated! 🙂
April 16, 2012 at 8:08 pm
Let the fun times begin Howie!! Fantastic Program with a coach who is a GREAT role model!!!
April 16, 2012 at 11:16 pm
Completely delicious!!!!! Woooohooooooo! Fan-friggin-tastic!!!!!
April 17, 2012 at 1:09 am
Wow – great post!
April 17, 2012 at 7:51 am
I love this! I’m glad you were able to find a solution. I’m now going to look for a special needs team in our area. My boys like sports, but not the intense, there may be a college scholarship riding on this, mentality that goes with them even at the very young ages.
April 17, 2012 at 10:04 am
Love the coach, love this story, and love the photos. Looks like you’ve found his happy place! Our nephew (also on the spectrum) plays soccer too, I think he likes figuring out the angles, or he likes that the ball tends to stick close to the ground. 🙂
April 17, 2012 at 12:38 pm
Yup. I’m crying. Thanks Alysia. You continue to give me hope.
April 18, 2012 at 12:01 pm
Wonderfully story,congratulations to help you son in his recreacion in his favorite athetic sport,with in my opinion wiil be healthy Body and healthy mind,blessings
April 18, 2012 at 6:07 pm
Oh my Lord woman, pass a tissue. There is so much to love I don’t know where to start….I’ll start with the coach. He is pure awesome wrapped up in bacon.
Ok, there’s a side story to the bacon. My son told me he loved me when I made bacon the other day so right now bacon and I are really tight.
April 18, 2012 at 10:05 pm
SO SO SO AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
April 19, 2012 at 11:35 am
Crying instead of doing laundry. Go Howie and Howie’s Mom and Coach Awesome!!! You all deserve a trophy for a wonderful game!
May 3, 2012 at 10:23 pm
[…] I see the change right away. With one dose. He’s calmer. Clearer. Words and thoughts and feelings are coming out that never did before. His first week on the medication was our spring break week. We are able to problem solve and work things through. His clothing anxieties are gone. I don’t have to sit in the room when he played with his brothers to facilitate play. I wasn’t sure if I was just seeing something because I wanted to see it, but others saw it too. When Howie returned to school, he had his best week in months. School work was fun again. He’s interacting with peers, taking turns, and playing games. He has two amazing soccer practices. […]
January 23, 2015 at 10:39 pm
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