“I took the kids to a barnyard and creamery. The goats are humping each other and there’s a bunny that is definitely not alive. And we got rear ended on the way here. Has school started yet?” – my text to a friend yesterday morning.
It has been a long hot week.
This was our first full week of summer vacation at home. Last week we spent three days in the middle of the week at Our Happiest Place on Earth. Not Disney, but Story Land in New Hampshire. So this was my first week that I was full on in charge of the daily activities for three boys who either play together fabulously or throw Hot Wheels cars at each other. There’s no in between.
So…yeah. I’ve been pulling 18 hour days of being Julie McCoy.
I woke up on Tuesday thinking it was Friday. That was bad wishful thinking.
There hasn’t been much in between with the weather too. For two weeks straight it’s been either torrential rains or 95 degrees out.
Friday was one of those days. It poured like crazy for two straight hours when we woke up and then turned blistering hot. I needed to escape the house and chose a little creamery near us that had a barnyard. They also had something called a “barnyard jump”, which looked like the bottom part of a bounce house. Even showing my kids all of this, it still took us 45 minutes to get out of the house.
Herding cats is an understatement.
We got about six minutes from our house, and I slowed the car down because the car in front of me was taking a left. I was at a complete stop when in my rear view mirror I see a small Toyota truck get closer and closer and…
BAM!
I pulled into the restaurant parking lot that was on the side of the road, and the 12 year old driving the truck got out, looking horrified.
(Yes, I’m sure she wasn’t 12. But she looked it. Because I’m that age now when anyone under twenty-five looks twelve.)
We exchanged info even though there wasn’t any visible damage to the car. The kids were wide-eyed but okay.
We got to the creamery right as it opened and the sun was beating down. As we piled out of the car, one of the girls working there walked by.
“Can you tell us where the barnyard bounce is?” I yelled across the parking lot.
“It’s down the hill but it’s not open. It’s too wet from all the rain.”
Um…what?
“Do you think it will open this morning?” I yelled again, with a slight hint of desperation.
“I have no idea!” yelled the girl back.
Oh good.
I turned to the boys and tried to explain the situation.
“So, the big jumpy thing is wet from all the rain and it’s not open now. I know it will be a disappointment if we can’t go on. But let’s go look at the animals and hey…how about ice cream for lunch!”
That seemed to settle them for a bit and we checked out the barnyard. On the hill below, more twelve-year-olds were walking around the big jumpy thing with giant hand dryers.
The barnyard had some cute baby chickens, some very loud grown-up chickens, goats, bunnies, alpacas, a pig and a cow.
The kids were most excited by a big dog that kept running by with a John Deere collar. He ran up and down between the two fences separating us from the animals.
There was one very quiet bunny laying by its water dish. At first, I thought he was just resting. It was 90 degrees after all. But then the dog ran by several hundred times and it didn’t move. A closer inspection by me as the kids ran with the dog proved that the bunny wasn’t breathing. The farmer (??) didn’t seem to notice and I didn’t want to upset the kids.
I was then distracted by the goats that started…um…climbing on top of each other.
“Time for ice cream for lunch!” I proclaimed.
That killed a good 30 minutes. I’m sure Howie ate all sorts of forbidden corn syrup products in his ice cream and I knew I’d pay later, but at that moment I just didn’t care.
(note: I forgot my camera, so these pictures were taken on my incredibly old BlackBerry. I only have space for 5 pictures to save on the phone so I delete the crummy ones along the way. Yes, these were the best ones.)
We left when Howie tried to follow the model train into the employees only area as Lewis was yelling “Pay online! Save time!”
(another note: if anyone can tell me what that is from, I would greatly appreciate it. So I can make sure he doesn’t watch it again.)
As I was about to tell the kids that we were going home, we noticed some kids jumping on the barnyard bounce.
So with bellies completely full of ice cream…away they went.
(last note: I also forgot sunscreen which meant we couldn’t play on the mini-golf course that was “calling my name!” as Gerry put it. I told them their dad would be upset if we golfed without him so we’d have to go back with him. Sorry Tim.)
Howie insisted on saying goodbye to the animals before we left. The definitely dead bunny was still there.
Once Lewis started taunting the goats with “Hey goat! Look at you stuck behind those two fences!”, it was time to go home.
On the way home, we drove by the spot where we were rear ended all those hours earlier. Howie proclaimed “Hey! That’s where that truck smashed into us!”
I am pretty sure we’ll hear that for the next 35 years.
We have ten more days before camp starts for Lewis and our Extended School Year program starts for Howie.
Until then, I’ll have my Julie McCoy hat on. Look for me. I’ll be the one herding the cats.
Ten more days. I can do it.
“Hot summer streets
And the pavements are burning
I sit around
Trying to smile but
The air is so heavy and dry
Strange voices are saying
(What did they say)
Things I can’t understand
It’s too close for comfort
This heat has got
Right out of hand
It’s a cruel, (cruel), cruel summer
Leaving me here on my own
It’s a cruel, (it’s a cruel), cruel summer
Now you’re gone” – Cruel Summer by Bananarama
Thinking of all my friends in the Mid-Atlantic states hit hard by last night’s storm. I hope you get your power back soon so you can read that I’m thinking about you






June 30, 2012 at 10:06 pm
Don’t hate me for laughing at your pain, okay? I think even Team Stimey would be proud of this outing! LOL.
June 30, 2012 at 10:40 pm
Oh, my!!!! I am with Niksmom….please don’t hate me for laughing at your pain. Oh, the poor little bunny and the truck rear ending you…..just oh, my!!!!!
June 30, 2012 at 11:04 pm
I having a really great time picturing all the 12 year olds you will see in the next ten days as you and your alter ego, julie, entertain the troops You can do it!
June 30, 2012 at 11:41 pm
You packed a summer-full of events into one day. I didn’t mean to chuckle, but the car-smash comment for the next 35 years?? Soooo very something I can relate to. Ten more days…ten more days….
July 1, 2012 at 8:26 am
ah NOW I feel so much better
you do know the John deere collar on the dog would have been what I would have heard about for 35 years
Let’s plan something for next week to help us both.
July 1, 2012 at 12:30 pm
Oh my! Is it bad that I laughed so hard?! You do have a good sense of humor.
July 2, 2012 at 1:16 pm
“Please don’t puke… please don’t puke” — LOL! If I had a nickel for every time I have thought that!
Somehow, you make me feel a lot better about those three weeks in between the last day of school and the start of LM’s summer camp/ESY. Hang in there, lady!
July 2, 2012 at 2:25 pm
I remember that Friday….it was like living in the inner sanctum of the Devil’s lair. It was bad. BAD. Just reading that gave me PTSD. But—-you got through it, we survived and hopefully (with enough alcohol) we’ll live to see another day. And you did it. And in the end thats all that really matters.
xxoo
July 2, 2012 at 7:56 pm
That jingle sounds like an car insurance commercial: “for a great rate you can get online, go to the General and save some time!”
At least the car was drive-able, right?
July 2, 2012 at 11:18 pm
This cracked me up! (Sorry. Haha!)
A, can we do a playdate? Please???
July 7, 2012 at 2:27 am
This post made me laugh. Love finding another parent that approaches this all with a twisted sense of humour. Laughter is always best, especially in the face of “sleeping bunnies” and bumper car antics en route.
July 7, 2012 at 2:23 pm
I think the ‘pay online save time’ was for a movie theater. I’m so sorry you had a bad time and we get to laugh. You did good though.
July 9, 2012 at 9:52 am
I always say that in some families it’s like herding cats, but in ours it’s like herding wet cats.
The 35yrs comment also cracked me up. Except here one of my children most definitely would have noticed the dead rabbit and told his siblings, which would mean I’d hear 35yrs about the car crash AND the dead rabbit.
I hope this week is a better one!