Every year at Thanksgiving, we go around the table at my mother’s house and say what we are grateful for.
My usual answer is, of course, my family. This year is no exception.
Except this time, my family has expanded quite a bit. It hasn’t been an easy year. But in the 11 months since my son’s autism diagnosis my family has grown to include this wonderful and welcoming community of fellow parents with children on the spectrum. I truly feel like they are all part of my inner circle now, because without them to lean on, I’m not sure I would have made it.
So forgive me if I forget a few names in this list – know that if you are out there and I’ve “met” you, you’ve helped me.
This year, I am thankful for:
- My friends from Spectrummy Mummy, Welcome to the Mad House, and I Should Have Called Him Calvin, who dropped everything when I was having a crisis of confidence to help me through it via e-mail exchanges, even in different time zones across the globe;
- My SibShop mom friends, who have shown me a path to being a better mother through their grace and humor and tireless dedication to our amazing community (I won’t “out” you here but you know who you are);
- The three moms who welcomed me immediately at my son’s school after his diagnosis, and who instantly invited me for playdates without hesitation;
- My support group, who without even knowing it have changed my life;
- My fellow writers Hartley, Caitlin, Patty and Michelle, whose amazing talents have pushed me to be a better writer;
- The writers in the SPD Blogger Network, who were the first people online to show me that I wasn’t alone;
- The high school and college friends that I have “rediscovered” here through this blog, who have encouraged me to write my story and who have been brave enough to share their parenting struggles with me;
- The moms of my kids’ best friends, who have become my best friends as well;
- My friend N., who while constantly crushing me at Facebook Scrabble still manages to make coffee squirt out of my nose with her hysterical instant messages; and
- The unbelievably honest and warm community of parent bloggers that I have grown to love and trust. There are too many to mention, but click on any name on any of the comments on any post in this blog and you’ll meet an amazing person doing heroic things every day.
Of course, I am also eternally thankful for my actual family this year too. My extended family of aunts, uncles and cousins chose the path less traveled by opening their arms and hearts to us to embrace our family, when they could have very easily turned away. My brother and sister-in-law have continued to be beyond supportive and helpful, even from across the country. My sister, of whom I am so proud, has asked me for a blue puzzle piece on her coat this winter. My mom, a special educator herself, has gone above and beyond what is expected of a grandmother. And she gets a huge thank you for staying with Tim and the boys when I went to see the Glee tour in New York City.
And just like every year, I am most grateful for my boys and for my husband Tim. Every day they make me thankful that I am a part of this family.
Howie came home yesterday from school with a drawing of me. His teacher asked him what he was thankful for and he said “my mom”.
Right back at you, little man. Right back at you.
Happy Thanksgiving!
“I got all my sisters with me
We are family
Get up ev’rybody and sing
Ev’ryone can see we’re together
As we walk on by
(FLY!) and we fly just like birds of a feather
I won’t tell no lie
(ALL!) all of the people around us they say
Can they be that close
Just let me state for the record
We’re giving love in a family dose” – We Are Family by Sister Sledge
November 24, 2010 at 7:19 am
I love this post! We got our diagnosis this year, too, and I don’t know where I’d be without my family, my real life autism mom friends, and the other autism parents on facebook and twitter!
November 24, 2010 at 7:24 am
exactly how I feel. exactly. Happy Thanksgiving!
November 24, 2010 at 7:21 am
oh honey such a great post and nice shout outs to all your extended family:) enjoy your Thanksgiving and thank-you for accepting my fb/blog friendship too. xo S~
November 24, 2010 at 7:24 am
thank you! and thank you for being a part of my new family!!
November 24, 2010 at 7:25 am
Happy thanksgiving. I’m grateful for moms like you. We are all in this together
November 24, 2010 at 8:48 am
we definitely are! so glad I’ve gotten to know you and your amazing daughter thru your blog!
November 24, 2010 at 7:35 am
Aaw, I got name-checked! Right back at you, sister from another mister! I’m way too English to carry off talking like that. I will stop now. Hope you survive the travel, and have a wonderful Thanksgiving- you deserve it!
November 24, 2010 at 8:49 am
How could I not thank you for not just that e-mail thread but for everything else?
November 24, 2010 at 8:24 am
What a wonderful post Alysia! Hugs to you and Happy Thanksgiving!
November 24, 2010 at 8:49 am
Thank you Jaimee. I’ve learned so much from your blogs – our lives are SO similar! Happy Thanksgiving to you too!
November 24, 2010 at 8:38 am
Even though I am a bad “lurker”, I am thankful for you too. It is just nice to know that you are not alone in your struggles! Thanks!
November 24, 2010 at 8:51 am
I love the lurkers!
I’m thankful that you took the time to introduce yourself to me on FB. I love these new connections we’re all making. Happy Thanksgiving!
November 24, 2010 at 9:20 am
Very well put! Enjoy your Thanksgiving and ALL you have to be thankful for!
November 24, 2010 at 9:39 am
thank you!!
November 24, 2010 at 9:57 am
Happy Thanksgiving my friend!!
November 24, 2010 at 5:50 pm
Happy Thanksgiving to you too my dear “new/old” friend. Wish you lived closer!
November 24, 2010 at 6:09 pm
thank you and Happy Thanksgiving to you all!
November 24, 2010 at 9:51 pm
I am thankful to have “met” you Alysia
Happy thanksgiving!
November 25, 2010 at 6:03 am
Although I may not yet be a parent of a child, or know enough about the autism spectrum. I do have a great number of friends who have kids of various ages who have been diagnosed with autism and I am trying to think of which one would be able to help you the most. I think a good start if you didn’t know about it already is http://www.autismangelsnetwork.org/ it’s been done by a friend Tanya who also runs a facebook group of the same name the amount of help available via those two places might help you a lot or a little. Happy Thanksgiving
one day thanksgiving will be my tradition too once I move from the UK to the US 
Via Mamapedia – don’t ask I friend signed me up, I know where to look when the time comes for me and my future wife to have kids of our own.
November 29, 2010 at 1:55 pm
Thank you for stopping by! I’m glad you’re a Mamapedia member! And thanks for all the info.
December 3, 2010 at 2:10 pm
Alysia – you needed no help from me or anyone else to push you into good writing – you are a natural! I really appreciate the easy flow of your style, the way you cram posts with great stuff without making us feel overwhelmed with information, the way I feel after reading your blog: like I’ve been sitting at your house enjoying a coffee with you, instead of a gazzilion miles away sitting at my computer. Someday, I hope I’ll actually get that real coffee in your living room
Caitlin
http://www.welcom-to-normal.com